Motivation

Steve and I are both trying to lose weight. We both have the same amount to lose and of course, he's doing better at it with a total of 15lbs to my 5lbs. I think it has to do with motivation.

When we first decided to try again at this, Steve came up with a whole series of motivation rewards for himself every 10lbs along with a reward at 25 and another at goal. He knew what would get him to work on the weight loss and it really does. When he's faced with food choices, I can see the wheels in his head turning, remembering the motivation. It's very cool to see him work hard at this.

Not that it helps me any. I have no will power and aparently my motivation reward is not good enough. I only picked one for a goal reward. It's not very motivating. The problem is it's too far off and doesn't feel close enough to reality. I guess I need to choose something to motivate me, but the only rewards I want that are non food related are also too hard to accomplish. things like a lunch out by myself somewhere, new clothes. Things that are totally dependent on the situation we are in at the time. I still don't think they would motivate me like Steve's do him.

Honestly, I want to lose weight. I do. it just feels so unreal though. I've been struggling with this weight for five years and I've gotten nowhere with it. I exercise regularly and it doesn't do anything. I watch what I eat, doesn't do anything. I just feel stuck. I've been tested for hypothyroid before and came up negative. I have all the same symptoms I did then, so I doubt the results would be different. Somedays I just feel like I will always be this size. Always have the awful fat rolls on my stomach and the butt that's way too big for one person. I do know I'm fat. There's just not a lot more I can do about it right now.

Anyway, I didn't start off to write a downer post. it's just something that's been preying on my mind lately. I just wish I could lose weight like Steve. He tends to yo-yo, but at least his yo-yo goes down half the time. Mine just goes up.

We would all like to think ourselves unique

But unfortuantly, statistics have shown that our name isn't. I've been faced with that reality since a small child. It's sort of a joke to me actually. Now I can make my total genericness completely official:

HowManyOfMe.com

There are: 4,201 people with my name in the U.S.A. How many have your name?

My only comfort is that Steve is one of 7,284 and is therefore even more generic than I am.

Although, I'm starting to wonder if giving my youngest a name shared by over one million other women was a good idea.

Grapes

I have grape juice in my house. Lots of it. 20 quarts. I processed 7 quarts of juice. I also bought six boxes of pectin to make jelly. I've never made grape jelly or cooked jelly of any kind, so I'm a bit nervous. It should be interesting to say the least. I always put off my Holly Homemaker stuff to late and the stores are sold out of canning lids. I have to hunt some down today.

I'm not ready for this.

Sarah is in middle school this year. Sixth grade. She informed us at the beginning of the year that there would be dances at school. We decided that she wasn't old enough to go to school dances yet. She's still young. She has her whole life to worry about boy/girl stuff. We don't need to rush it.

So Friday she came home and told me about her day. One of the boys at school asked her to go to the dance with him. An eighth grader. She told him she wasn't allowed to go to the dances. She then said she would have told him no anyway because he was so much older than her.

I guess we have been neglecting part of our parenting. It never even occured to her that going to a dance with a boy is a date and she's definitely not old enough to do that.

But hey, it's nice to know she's not attracted to older men. I sure hope that lasts, at least through high school! LOL