Thursday, September 01, 2005

I guess I'm shallow

I don't get network televison. we would have to buy cable or satilite and I can't see spending that much so our kids can zone out in front of Spongebob. So we basically arent' getting much news lately. and I like it that way! I like not having to see the networks revisit the same horror stories over and over. I like not knowing how low human beings can sink when they are desperate. I like not seeing the images flash across my screen.

I don't like being emotional. I don't like crying. I will shut myself off first. I'm not seeking out news from the Gulf Coast because I don't want to see it. My heart aches for those who are hurt, who are missing, who's lives have been ripped to pieces. but I don't want to see it.

On the way home from Ut this past weekend we drove past a wreck. There was a full sized semi laying on it's side and then behind it this compact car without a back end. it was gone. just not there. they cut the doors off the front and I could see the air bag inflated in front of the steering wheel. The trailer was smashed and there were brown boxes leaking out the cracks in the twisted metal. We drove past this at 70 mph. I could hardly breathe.

This image replays in my mind at odd times and my chest literally aches thinking about the possibility of someone being in that back seat. I don't want more awful images in my head. I guess that means I'm shallow, but it's how I deal.

8 comments:

April said...

You're not shallow Amy. Everyone deals with things their own way.

THM said...

You shallow heartless unfeeling... oh, wait, I've been actively avoiding images from the storm zone since Monday. However, I doubt that me saying I feel the same way would convince anyone else that either of us is normal.

Becky said...

It doesn't mean your shallow. Like April said, we all deal with things differently.

Jess said...

I agree with April and Becky. Please don't think yourself shallow.

Rhoda said...

I'll be shallow with you, because I feel the same way!
Love you blog...just stumbled on it this morning (the..I Hope You Break A Leg entry). Hubby was reading over my shoulder and wondered what the heck I was doing *grin* He just doesn't get cyber space :)
Have a great day!
Rhoda

May said...

I don't think you are shallow- it's how you cope. I can't deal with all the images on TV, so mine stays off this last week.

Your page on the previous post is BEAUTIFUL, and I think it's funny that a toy was found in your sugar bowl. =)

Holly said...

Yah, I don't like Spongebob either.

MarilynH said...

Amy, I feel the same way!! If i let what has happened into my brain, I can't stand it.

1000 refugees are coming to live at Camp Williams (about 600 are already there) and it is about 20 minutes from our house. I want to do something. I can handle that much.