A: I had a dream last night that Johnny Depp propositioned me and I turned him down. Aren't you impressed by my faithfulness?
S: that depends. Which Johnny? Pirate's Johnny? Charlie and the Chocolate Factory Johnny?
A: Peter Pan Johnny.
S: ooooh. well then I am impressed.
2 comments:
If you had dreams like mine, it would have been JM Barrie in a park to start. But then he would have turned, and then turned back around wearing a stupid hat, with Willie Wonka's creepy grin stretched across his plastic-looking face, and you'd be standing on the sidewalk of an idyllic subdivision with extavagant topiaries. Then he'd reach up to touch your cheek, but it would be with one of Edward's "Scissorhands". Of course, now you'd look down, and see that he was wearing black patent leather pants, but a very ragged, yet very flamboyant pirate's shirt, and he would have bad teeth, with bad gold caps. Now you notice that you're on a pirate ship with a stone fountain in the middle of the deck. He starts walking towards the cargo hold, and you follow him down the ladder. Only when you get to the bottom, you're in a high school locker room, and a younger Johnny is sitting there brooding over what to do about his buddy who's hooked on steroids. Then the Oompa Loompas start singing and dancing and then you run into a talking Ring-tailed Lemur looking for bugs, calling you "Martin", and you've completely forgotten about Johnny What's-his-name?.
Yes, I have strange dreams. But never that one...dang it! :)
ROFL!!!
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